Haiku Society of America Rengay Award
in Honor of Garry Gay
Judges Commentary for 2022
Judged by
Kristen Lindquist & Michael Dylan Welch
OVERALL COMMENTS
Our congratulations to everyone who participated in the 2022 Haiku Society of America Rengay Contest, because writing itself is its own reward. We received 43 entries and admired each rengay’s exploration of various themes—having a theme is, after all, rengay’s cornerstone. We looked for themes that were clear to readers (not just targets for writers, which can sometimes remain unclear to readers), fine individual haiku, a pleasing development of verses, and strong titles. All but one of our selections happened to be two-person rengay, but we encourage more three-person rengay as well. We hope you enjoy reading these selections and our commentary and feel inspired to write many rengay (or more rengay) in the months ahead.
2022 First Place
An Extra Leaf
realizing
there ’ll be no grandkids
winter deepensanother autumn
too old for a puppyalways leftovers
we fatten up
the straysan extra leaf
in the closet
family dinnerspare rooms
just spare roomssamara seeds
a blue ribbon tied
to the neighbor ’s mailboxBryan Rickert 1, 3 & 5
Terri L. French 2, 4 & 6This winning rengay captures in a quiet, understated way an older person or couple’s thwarted desire for a grandchild, for a new generation to carry on the family line as one ages. There’s much more going on here then is apparent at first glance. This sense of endings is linked imagistically to year’s end in the first two verses, as well as to the “extra leaf” of the title and the fourth verse, which evokes both autumn foliage and the family tree. An interesting thread about unneeded excess also runs through these verses: there’s always extra food for strays, the table leaf isn’t needed even for “family dinner,” and spare rooms remain uninhabited. It’s as if every aspect of the domestic scene is a reminder of the absent child(ren). And there’s clearly much that could be shared, making the lack that much more difficult to reconcile. The culminating verse, with its “blue ribbon,” which we took to indicate the birth of a son into the neighbor’s family, a “win” for them, rounds out the emotional journey with a complex sense of wistful envy tinged with loneliness. ~ Kristen Lindquist
This domestic rengay begins with the premise of lacking grandchildren—and presumably desiring them. We go from a deepening winter ahead nearly a full year to “another autumn” where the people in the poem realize that even a puppy isn’t possible. The rengay shifts to feeding stray animals, a sort of surrogate not just for puppies but for grandchildren. From there the loss of potential family members manifests itself in the dining room table’s unused extra leaf and the spare room left unvisited. The final verse becomes a sort of consolation and yet not. The blue ribbon suggests winning a prize, but it’s the neighbor’s prize. And the blue color is also a gender-reveal for a baby boy. Samara seeds suggest new life, and they have sprouted for the neighbor but not for the poets writing this rengay. The neighbor’s public announcement contrasts with the poets’ private loss. We are left to wonder if they are happy for their neighbors or perhaps envious. ~ Michael Dylan Welch
2022 Second Place
Weavings
rose-laced dawn
a young girl sweeping petals
from the courtyardold narrow bed
our parents sleep entwinedGanga ghat
the barefoot cobbler
with crossed legsa rickshaw puller
wipes his sweat
city dinfestival tuk-tuk
my driver ’s betel-stained teethVedic chants
weaving prayers in one thread
a garland of marigoldsBillie Dee 1, 3 & 5
Neena Singh 2, 4, & 6A rich cultural context weaves itself into this rengay, adding an exotic flavor for North American readers. The first two verses might at first seem to be possible anywhere, focusing on entwinings. But from the third verse on, readers know we are in India, which makes us reconsider the location of the first two verses. We experience temples, transportation devices, and religious chants, each one further developing the theme of things woven together. The dawn is laced with color, parents wrap themselves together in bed, legs are crossed, the city’s din envelops a sweating worker, teeth are stained, and prayers weave themselves into a garland of flowers. This rengay weaves us into its world. ~ Michael Dylan Welch
2022 Third Place
In the Expanse
faint echoes
from the stones
a raven ’s callguinea fowl pick over
the empty waterholescratched onto blue
the black
of an eagle ’s wingsemus . . .
spinifex
to the horizoncrested bellbird – courting notes
buried in the dunesa puddle
filled with sky
pink cockatoosKristen Lang 1, 3 & 5
Lorraine Haig 2, 4 & 6The birds throughout this piece provided one lovely thread of thematic consistency, with their activities creating movement from land to air and back again through each verse. We also enjoyed how the title helped evoke another layer: the sense throughout of a spare landscape serving as backdrop to the energetic birds, from the echoing stones of the first verse to an empty waterhole to, ultimately, a reflection that captures in one image both the water and sky of previous verses. There’s also a fun progression here from black or dark birds to the ebullience of pink cockatoos in the final verse.
~ Kristen Lindquist
2022 Honorable Mentions (in judges' rank order)
Angst
sneaking back in
past curfew
a prick of the rose bushsnapped twig
the motion sensor lightmy mother
sits on my bed
not another talkwaning moon
my daughter ’s
monosyllable answerstwo weeks grounded
my light turns offbathroom trash can
I worry about
her periodYvette Nicole Kolodji 1, 3 & 5
Deborah P Kolodji 2, 4 & 6This unique rengay expresses anxiety from two different points of view. The first three verses seem to present the daughter’s viewpoint, sneaking in late after curfew, triggering a motion-sensor light, and finding her mother waiting for her on her bed. The last three verses seem to show the mother’s point of view, starting with noticing the daughter’s reluctant monosyllables. In the fifth verse, the mother has grounded her daughter and can now turn off her own light with reduced stress, knowing her daughter is home. And in the final verse, the mother frets about the daughter’s growing up, perhaps even worrying that she might be pregnant. We don’t know why the daughter missed curfew, but we do know the mother punished the daughter, and yet the mother remains concerned and empathetic. ~ Michael Dylan Welch
Drifiting Out of the Frame
turning to dust
what ’s pinned in
the shadowboxher love letters
in faded inkbecoming more
mother ’s face
or less minewings worn down
to gossamerlavender sachet
her memories no longer come
when calleddandelion seeds drifting
out of the frameMichele Root-Bernstein 1 & 4
Laszlo Slomovits 2 & 5
Jennifer Burd 3 & 6From the title on down, this delicate rengay is tonally consistent with its focus on ephemerality and the passing of time: dust, faded ink, an aging face, worn feathers, and, more profoundly, the loss of memory, which links beautifully to the final image of dandelion seeds floating away—the perfect imagistic shift away from the poem itself. ~ Kristen Lindquist
Off You Go!
corn stubble
the camouflage
of a killdeer's eggdots under a dock leaf
left by a butterflyon a pond
the sound of nothing . . .
frogspawnsunlight
filling the blossoms
with beesmilkweed fluff
off you go!the last crack
opens the world
hummingbirdAlan S. Bridges 1, 3 & 5
Jacquie Pearce 2, 4 & 6This rengay celebrates small things, starting and ending with eggs. We also see butterfly eggs in the second verse, frog eggs in the third verse, and bees and milkweed seeds in the fourth and fifth verses. Then we end with another bird egg in the last verse, this time one as small as a hummingbird’s yet still opening to something as grand as the entire world when that delicate hummingbird egg cracks open. The potential of beginnings brings all these verses together, with the bees transferring pollen and the milkweed seeds suggesting new life, in addition to the eggs in all the other verses. Even the title inspires and energizes us: off you go! ~ Michael Dylan Welch
Desert Highway
the feather trapped
in a Chevy grill
dust devil horizonriding an updraft
turkey vulturesrock doves
preen in the heat
ATV exhaustwindswept dunes
distant echoes
from campfiresold coyote
scavenging scrapsstar-filled night
a kangaroo rat
noses the tent flapBillie Dee 1, 3 & 5
Naia 2, 4 & 6Just as a highway introduces a human-made element to the spare desert landscape, almost every verse in this rengay depicts wild desert creatures interacting or juxtaposed with human artifacts, culminating in a perfect, whimsical way with a kangaroo rat about to enter a tent. The desert becomes a shared landscape. Several verses link in interesting ways, too, through images of rising air: dust devil, updraft, exhaust, implied smoke. ~ Kristen Lindquist
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